tea drinkers: unlike you filthy disgusting creatures i only drink green chamomile peppermint raspberry lemon tea, which makes all my insides glow 10 times brighter and improve. i can feel my body get healthier by every drink i take of my delicious hot mug of TEA. youre absolutely disgusting and a waste of human potential
coffee drinker: hhhnng lov those beans
someone tagged this as #tw drama
coffee drinkers: i am unimaginably powerful. i can see through time. i haven’t slept in four days but who needs sleep when you are on a higher plane of existence. the beans are in my soul, they are in my heart. i AM the beans. soon i will vibrate at the harmonic resonance of the universe and transcend.
tea drinker: hhhhhhhhhhhot leaf juice
soda drinkers: death is coming. death is coming. pass me a hotdog.
energy drink drinkers: (just the fucking kill bill sirens played on repeat for eternity)
[Image Description: Tags reading “vibrators, STEAM-POWERED vibrators, you heard that right folks”]
The AO3 Tag of the Day is: True aesthetic dedication
Spouse is an engineer and I’m here to say steam DOES get hot, but it is quite possible to make a steam-powered vibrator that doesn’t. Think of a steam locomotive, where the boiler is kept hot but the wheels, which are powered by the boiler, do not.
So you have a boiler by the bed and then TUBES and LINKAGES, GEARS, COPPER, all the good stuff. Hell, the steam might even be used to generate electro-magnetism! So it weighs 30kg (about 65lbs). It’s awesome! Beautiful! Scientific! LOUD.
CHUNKA-CHUNKA-CHUNKA
Summon the coal-shovelers to power up the fuckinator
Summon the coal-shovelers to power up the fuckinator
The most common Victorian era steam powered vibe was called “The Manipulator” and it was a weighty beast. This is the most common photo of it.
Yall I think I may have been cursed by a very muscular cat that lives outside
???
Okay I’m gonna tell yall the Legend of Buff Cat™
So we take care of a family of cats that live on our back porch basically. There’s Cat Stevens the mom, her four kittens, and Joe, a grey kitty that hangs out with them. We put food and water out every day and they come out and hang around and lounge and play and shit.
There’s a few other stray kitties that come in and bully them to get to the food. Big Head Cat, Tiger Kitty and Buff Cat. Buff Cat is the most RIPPED cat I have EVER seen. He’s all black and he has like a tiny white patch of fur on his chest. I only ever saw him ONCE until the other night when I heard cats fighting outside. Thinking it was my cat being a dick, I went to break it up, but he was upstairs and no where near the other cats. So I went downstairs and Buff Cat was there, by himself, sitting on top of the wooden fence and staring me down. It was creepy as SHIT. Like this cat has an ENERGY about him.
A few days after this incident my dad tells me he has a dream about my cat getting outside and then he looks out there and FUCKING SEES BUFF CAT STARING AT HIM. He has only seen this cat ONCE.
Anyways I go downstairs to get ready to walk to work at 7AM and I see him, again, just STARING at me, and manage to get a picture:
I swear to god I took this picture, BLINKED and he was gone. Like, looking at this picture makes me feel super wrong. I showed it to a friend and they told me I shouldn’t take pictures of Eldritch Beings.
So I JUST get finished telling this story to my good friends @maris-solstice and @foxcoloredcat and I decide I want to get a snack, so I walk downstairs and
THERE HE IS AGAIN IN THE SAME POSITION, STARING RIGHT AT ME. YOU’D THINK IT’S THE SAME PICTURE BUT THESE WERE, IN FACT, TAKEN 11 HOURS APART.
So there’s the story of how I am now cursed by a cat that is probably a demon or was probably at one time a person that was turned into a cat.
Oh my god thats so weird!
That reminds me of a cat i called Atilla the Hun who was a big mf and would linger by the pool during winter. He had like a mane of beige fluff around his neck
OP it sounds like you have a fairy.
The Cat Sìth (Scottish Gaelic: [kʰaht̪ ˈʃiː]) or Cat Sidhe (Irish: [kat̪ˠ ˈʃiː], Cat Sí in new orthography) is a fairy creature from Celtic mythology, said to resemble a large black cat with a white spot on its chest.
The Chaos Bitches 