When my cousin Olivia was three, she started preschool and became best friends with a boy named Abraham. Most people called him Abe, even then, because Abraham is a mouthful for a three year old and, to most people, it’s the logical nickname.
Not, however, according to Olivia, who decided to nickname him Ham.
No one’s really sure whether she wasn’t totally listening when he was introduced and only caught the last part of his name, or if she decided Abe was too boring a nickname, or maybe she was just hungry, but the nickname has stuck for the last twenty years. Of course, Olivia was and still is the only person to use it.
When they were seven or eight, he decided to get back at her by calling her Olive. That nickname stuck, too, and they’ve been Olive and Ham since. But only to each other. They get highly offended if anyone else calls them that.
Last night was their seventh anniversary, and Abe proposed to Olivia, and she said yes. And how did she announce it on Facebook, you may ask?
People used to tell me “If you like ham so much, why don’t you just marry it?” So I am.
Shout out to Olive and Ham, who are still engaged and adorable and who are planning on getting married sometime next summer
Keep in mind, it’s not a batam chicken, it has some birth defect that makes it smaller than an average small chicken, we think. I don’t know. We didn’t expect this.
This is Cicero.
We thought Cicero was a rooster, mostly from fear of him being a hen and trying to lay an egg, only to end up egg bound.
Well, today we learned that Cicero the Rooster is actually Cicero the Hen.
AND LOOK
AT WHAT
SHE LAID
A TINY EGG.
I’VE NEVER SEEN ANYTHING LIKE IT.
IF WE HATCH IT WOULD A TINIER CHICKEN BE HATCHED??
WILL IT CONTINUE UNTIL WE HAVE THE SMALLEST CHICKEN IN THE WORLD??
WHY DID MY SISTER NAME THE CHICKEN AFTER HER MATH TEACHER??
The Chaos Bitches 