i see your ‘nowhere in the nursery rhyme does it say humpty dumpty was an egg’ and raise you ‘nowhere in the legendarium does tolkien say that elves have pointed ears’
Mary Shelley didn’t give the monster bolts.
Arthur Conan Doyle never put Holmes in a deer stalker (also “elementary my dear Watson” is never said in the books, and he doesn’t smoke a curved pipe)
There are boys at Beauxbatons and girls at Durmstrang schools
Edgar Allan Poe wrote the earliest essay on the big bang theory
just saw the words “did rasputin do something problematic, i thought he was just russias greatest love machine” and that is just an incredible, incredible sentence. i want you to imagine explaining that to an early 20th century russian citizen. just fantastic.
why would i fuck a demon? simple, the status. imagine rolling up into hell already havin had ur back blown out by one of their own. imagine you and a gang of other losers standin at the gates of hell, they’re all crying, scared to death about having a pitchfork up their ass for eternity and you just walk into the arms of your sugar demon? legendary.
The Chaos Bitches 