factual and fictional introjects all deserve to be able to be honest about their identities and live as themselves.
they cannot control who they are and how they formed, same as any other system member, and they should not be forced into changing themselves to seem more valid and less cringe-worthy to other people.
the safety and happiness of all your systemmates is something to strive for, even for the ones the world considers shameful.
You can also help them understand by mixing kisses with rubbing your cheek/nose/forehead over the top of their head, their cheek, or down their shoulders, just like cats rub against each other and humans to show affection. Also gently bonking foreheads to imitate the ‘I love you please pet me’ headbutt. Brushing & scratching at itchy spots for them imitates the grooming that cats who live together in colonies do for each other. Basically just try to find hygienic ways of imitating cat social behaviors, short of actual licking, lol.
My cat will touch her nose to mine & rub her cheek across my face, which allows me to plant a kiss on her cheek. When she’s sitting in my lap, she’ll tip her head back until I lean down and kiss or nuzzle the top of her head. I’ve even found her occasionally trying to imitate the “mwah!” sound of my kisses, where she’ll nuzzle my face and make little chirping “mah! mah!” sounds. Cats are pretty smart little social creatures; they’ll figure out how to speak your language, especially if you put in the effort to speak theirs.
reminder that fictives often “deviate from their canon” and this is a normal thing to do, especially if they’ve been in the system for awhile. don’t get mad at them for changing.
It wasn’t just a random day in class. It was her thesis. Thesis presentations should be professional and if you aren’t willing to wear proper business attire to present your thesis you don’t deserve a degree, don’t deserve entry into the adult world.
I’m sure if some dude showed up in gym shorts and a tank top the teacher would have said something too. I’d love to see her pull this shit at an actual job.
You are suppose to dress professional and respectable for these presentations and any your upper asks you too.
She should be failed and if anything suspended for stripping in a public place.
I doubt anyone would want to willingly hire someone like her now, Jesus.
I would hire her. She was presenting a thesis, not her dress. And what she did was brave.
Maybe, but that’s not how college works. I know from a guy who dared to wear jeans and a shirt to that… He almost get eaten alive by the jury. There is a clear and specific rule about how you should dress for a thesis presentation. I hate formal clothes and would happily were shorts if I could. But that is against the norms of official presentations. You can protest that norm, ofc, i also think you are not presenting your outfit BUT do it in another moment and in a serious way. That wasnt brave, just was attention seeking and petit bourgeois feminism. She should knew how to go dressed for that thing and it’s not fair that she skips the rule but the rest cant with the excuse of feminism.
It’s like with doctors. We are taught a lot about how we should dress with this or that. Not because that really matters but because you are in a specific professional position and image is important. It’s the same in all works. You have dressing rules in every job and you cant just get undressed everytime someone calls you out for breaking them.
She wasnt in a normal class nor walking on the street. She was in a very specific very professional environment with strict rules and dress code. You cant go to a Congress and do that right? Im sorry but this is just not good. Pure sensationalism without any real protest or principle behind
She was in a normal class, doing a trial presentation when she was singled out because her professor felt that her outfit for this normal, regular class was too sexual.
In a regular class, she was asked what her mother would think of her skimpy shorts. Not in her thesis presentation, in a regular ass class. A class that explicitly has no dress code.
Her professor then apologized to the class after she left, but not to her.
That’s why she elected to take a stand during her thesis presentation, not simply by stripping, but by asking her audience to strip too, as a way to highlight the power imbalances in the room and seek solidarity despite them.
Afterward, she has received dozens of thank yous from other students who experienced similar microaggressions on her campus.
But sure, this is definitely just an example of a young woman being provocative for provocation’s sake, and couldn’t possibly have been rooted in a real example of sexism. /sarcasm
And did you really call her decision to defy the sexism she faced and was NEVER apologized to from a person IN POWER OVER HER as “petit bourgeois”? Are you just using that term for laughs? Do you understand what you’re saying there?
What part of “I was targetted for sex-based commentary by someone in power over me, and I elected to organize an entire room full of other students to stand up against that kind of behaviour” says “docile ally of the ruling class, seeking to recreate their power structures on a smaller scale for personal benefit” to you?
fuck these responses. the whole idea of “proper attire” is classist at its roots and it unfairly targets women and people of color. we were all born naked. if you have a problem with what someone else is wearing, maybe think about why you were conditioned to react that way in the first place and why you’re blindly following a 100% useless (and often harmful) social standard.
It’s not classist at all. I grew up flat broke and always dressed properly. Couldn’t even afford Walmart. Had to go bargain hunting in thrift shops, salvation army, Goodwill, etc. My parents were a lot negative of things but they did teach me how to carry myself with some semblance of decency.
If your doctor, lawyer, dentist, accountant, etc walked in without a shirt on you wouldn’t feel all too comfortable and/or confident with the level of professionalism you’re about to receive.
Dress and look the part.
@xenoqueer – now you’re the one misinterpreting things. There was an expectation that they dress “how they wish to be perceived” and the professor DID apologize.
Her class also all talked about how the professor didn’t mean anything negative and how Chai was creating a false narrative.
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As for proper attire – it’s a projection of self. If we have collectively decided X clothing is streetwear then wearing X clothing to a serious event is disrespectful. Human cultures have a long history of dressing up for occasions, our textiles and garments have always been important.
When you dress the part for something, you feel different and preform different – it changes your mindset. It changes how people perceive you – do you look prepared and well put together? If so, you’ll probably handle other things in life with the same care. The sad truth is, concealing secondary sex characteristics is a part of this. It’s more about going with the convention than anything else.
It’s an important dance we all have to deal with. As mentioned by @amarretto-cowboy, cost isn’t actually much of a barrier to looking presentable. You don’t have to wear Gucci- you can get a button down and slacks. One outfit can last you the entirety of your high school and college years. You can even rent an outfit, or borrow from a friend because it’s only a day event.
Listen, you mean well, and I appreciate that, but I’m on day five of a streak of death threats, I haven’t been able to afford groceries for two weeks, and I’m just super done with people trying to reframe this situation.
A teacher told a student in a no dress code class that her clothes were too sexy.
The teacher never apologized to the student, only to other classmates. Other classmates accepted that apology, but it was never extended to the targeted student.
The student protested that.
The student received support from other students who had been similarly attacked.
That’s the timeline of events in it’s simplest form.
And people are taking that timeline, and trying to twist it into proof that the student was entitled.
And they’re using poverty- the reason I can’t afford food, that poverty- as a tool to do it.
Can you imagine why I might have trouble taking your argument in good faith?
And if you want to talk about poverty and dress codes, sure, let’s talk about how I’ve got a failing organ and two medications that in conjunction have caused me to gain 60 lbs in a year, and none of my “nice” clothes fit anymore, and I’m going out in my pajamas all the time because I can choose food or “appropriate clothing.”
There is absolutely and undeniably a class element to dress codes, but that’s not even the argument here.
The argument is that a young woman of color was sexualized by her teacher who apologized to everyone but her.
And she took a stand against that.
And now she gets to be villainized for not being quiet about it.
Shoutout to all the straight girls that after finding out that their gal friends were into girls NEVER got weird about giving them hugs, holding hands, cuddling in front of the tv, dancing close at clubs. Basically still as physically affectionate as they always were. That’s how you ally ✌🏽
Also the ones that are demanding selfies of your crush. The ones that want to hear every single detail of your dates from the romantic to the sexual. Who acknowledge that this is a part of you and fully embrace it.
Shoutout to the ones that are going with their friends to PRIDE, events, or nightclubs so they don’t go alone. When you’re first coming out you often don’t know anyone in the community and it’s nice to have someone st your side as you navigate through it. The friends that are respectful of our safe spaces and want us to have the same experiences they do. ✌🏽
The Chaos Bitches 