me, holding my newborn child: what are its stats??
Class: Infant Race: human Strength: 0 can barely support own head Agility 0 needs to learn to walk Intelligence: 2, understands that crying brings food, replacement of soiled garments with fresh ones Wisdom 1 no object permanence Charisma: 20 becuase people lose their shit around babies, -1 for each month until Terrible Twos and all Charisma drops to 1.
HP: 2
Spells per day: Cloudkill, Telepathic Summons, Sleep (casts on Self),
Infant fingernails: does +1 cutting/slashing damage
The other day I got a bug up my ass about lake Natron, because I’ve seen the photos of the calcified remains of animals that took a dip in the lake on accident, but I’ve only seen those photos in black and white. I’m sure you’ve seen them.
I thought, you know, calcified remains should be really interesting to see in color, so I tried to find some that had been taken by others, in color. It was not nearly as visual stunning, they were just white rotting remains, I won’t scar anyone by posting them.
But what caught my eye wasn’t the dead. It was the fucking lake.
It’s BLOOD fucking RED.
It’s super alkaline (deadly), blood fucking red (terrifying), and oh, it gets to be 106F/41C in the water. Red spirulina algae thrives here and provides food for the main denizen of the lake…. fucking lesserflamingos.
Look at their fucking mud nests!
You need to leave!! You have found flamingo Silent Hill!! What are you still doing here!! I’ll tell you!! They’re still doing there because literally the death lake protects them from predators, nothing big enough to be a threat to them gets across the lake to get them. There are millions of them living there safely.
What the fuck. what the FUCK nature. This is some of the most amazing shit you’ve ever pulled and hardly anyone knows about it. I’m on to you. I see your blood lake with your pink goth bird decorations. I see you.
anyway I’m browsing vampire fetish forums like I usually do to cheer myself up and this girl asked if there are any hot vampire dudes out there looking to hook up or if they’re simply too hard to find and someone replied “Not With a body like your you just got to find one. I am not vampire but I am not mortal. I am Tuath Dé. you are cute message me”
and I have not gotten over this and probably never will.
“sorry I’m not a vampire but I AM an ancient Irish deity. Ur cute hmu”
like Im fucking REELING I want this to be real for the sheer ridiculousness of it. never in my life have I wanted more for magic to exist on this Earth than in this moment.
this post is twelve different kinds of fantastic but I’d like to take a moment and crop out my absolute favorite thing about it which is
Sometimes good posts are made by annoying people so I’ll help out
These are Safe Shorts. They were made by Sandra Seilz after someone attempted to rape her. If the fabric is torn, an alarm will be sounded.
This is the Rape-aXe, invented by a South African doctor by the name of
Sonnet Ehlers. After interviewing a rape victim who wished she had teeth down there, she made this. If someone’s penis is inserted and pulled back out, the teeth will sink in, and can only be removed by a doctor.
The Killer Tampon (couldn’t find a site for it), made by retired anaesthetist Jaap Haumann. When penetration takes place, the sharp end will slice the offending appendage.
The Anti-Rape Belt (also couldn’t find a site), made by a group of Swedish teenagers led by Nadja Björk. It requires two hands to undo.
Anti-Rape Underwear/Bra (once again), as made by a group of Indian students. Will deliver an electric shock when met with unwanted advances, as well as sounding an alarm.
Undercover Colours. Made by 4 male undergraduates at North Carolina U, they change colours when in contact with chemicals or drugs that cause unconsciousness. Used in case you’re wary that your drink has been roofied.
These are just tools to help, but in addition to being mindful of your situations and staying safe, they can help when the worst happens.
Stay safe.
ok, those are all kind of awesome. i wish they weren’t needed, bit still…awesome solutions.
I feel more comfortable reblogging this version
RapeAxe has a gofund me up that barely has 700 dollars. I feel like the inventions that havent even been funded yet should be linked to the page you can support them at.
The Chaos Bitches 