swordlesbianism:

swordlesbianism:

Gays are so easy to please all I have to do is type out “swords” in rainbow colours and you all just lose your gay minds over it

Gays are apparently even easier to please all I have to do is reference a post in which I typed “swords” in rainbow colours and they will give it hundreds of notes

swordlesbianism:

SWORDS

toastyhat:

shakespork:

wierdrocks:

killerkitty707:

“Yoink” is the opposite of “Yeet”

But it’s just as fast

one giveth and one taketh away

#…one yoinketh and one yeeteth away – @5qui99l3

too-easy-being-green:

zerpderptwerp:

eternalgirlscout:

i will kill you: basic threat; overused; lacks serious weight

pee your pants: up-and-coming; respectable; unexpected

i will pee your pants: full of the promise of grief and terror; absolutely devastating

Your pants can’t wait for my pee

And here we have it, the most terrifying sentence in the universe

unnameablethings:

corvidprompts:

“I don’t need to go to bed, I’m not tired, I’ll be fine.”

“But, darling, I’ll be so lonely without you. Come curl up in my arms so I can feel whole again.”

“O-oh. Well. Are you trying to seduce me into healthy sleeping patterns?”

“Is it working?”

the amount of people tagging this as “this would work on me” is INTENSELY FUNNY YOU’RE ALL SO FUCKIN VALID

lieutenant-sapphic:

hey-im-anxiety:

werbly:

i put new yellow shoelaces on my boots to show people i am Cool. I walk to my work full of old lady cashiers. “I like your shoelaces.” one of them says to me. I see my life flash before my eyes as this ancient test is presented before me

Op did you say it

did you say it op